Good McLean Fun

Ever get tired? Feel defeated? Overwhelmed? Totally discouraged? Me either. With Jesus in my heart and a song on my lips, my life is pure joy and contentment. I cannot be moved! Just kidding. That's not the truth. The truth is people call me supermom and wonderwoman, and I'm neither. The truth is I am a pathetic whiny failure who makes too many mistakes to be called good in any way.. and I'm a baby. The truth is when I say my house is a disaster, it really is. Few can compare. The truth is everyone said the first year of having twins was the hardest, and in reality it has only gotten harder. The truth is the twins have the speech development of 18month olds, and when I stop holding on to peace, other things rush in. Things like discouragement, defeat, disbelief, anger, guilt, and envy. The truth is I sometimes compare them to their older siblings and get so irritated with them I want to quit. The truth is I have five beautiful children but my favorite part of the d...

Levi says thanks! 2 weeks post op Day after We had so many people praying for us, and for Levi, that I wouldn't have been surprised if Levi had been miraculously healed overnight.  That, however, wasn't part of God's design. The blessings that came our way were surely Him though, working through prayers. Please be warned, I use the word "blessing" a lot in this post, which may become redundant to the reader, but that is the best word to use in this story...no pseudonyms for this one. I won't be telling people we were super lucky, or very fortunate, and I won't be giving credit to fate, or the universe. This story is about choosing to recognize blessings from God.  So for those wondering how it all went down, here is what your prayers got us: From the moment of the diagnosis, I felt peace. I drove up to Orlando with Levi by myself, having spent some time on the internet the day before googling "abnormal infant skull"...

I am feeling much more composed and in charge of my emotions than I was a few hours ago, so I'll share with you today's trivial tribulation, expressed in an email written to a friend this morning. It sounds trivial, I know. But it felt monumentally devastating at the time. "I have to vent for a second, I'm glad you wrote. In a nutshell I had an emotional breakdown this morning, tears streaming and everything. I am so hesitant to do stuff with the twins because there are 2 of them, I can't control as much if it were just one 2 year old, so I never take them places alone without another adult who has free hands. This morning I decided to just suck it up, stop sheltering them, be brave, let them experience something new, and with my other two I always brought them to a local library preschool story hour, I figure just clapping, dancing, read a book or two, maybe some coloring.. I thought we could do it. I packed them up and we drove to the library. I got there and...

It's happening. After five years of living in Abuela's house, up to 10 people, after adding three children to our family, God's giving us our next adventure. I am moved to tears as I retell how it came to be. We've been on and off again looking for a new job opportunity for Ryan all these five years. There were more than a few times when we found a job opening that I thought, "This is it, the timing is right, this is where God wants us."-- but it never worked, and quickly we'd get distracted by our everyday lives to keep the search going. As the tension of so many adults and children under one roof mounted this past year, we knew we needed to be aggressive about the job hunt this summer, and we were more desperate than ever to have our own space.  Ryan applied to about 7 engineering firms, and we were thrilled to hear back from two of them within a week. Interviews were set up. In one day he interviewed in Orlando and West Palm Beach, and both intervi...

Ever been curious about fasting? Seeking God through discipline and denying oneself is the core principle.  Gotta say, I did a full fast for 3 days (no food, only water) followed by the Daniel Fast (only fruit, veggies, whole grains, and water) for 18 days in January 2010 and I prayed for blessings for my family, but specifically for my children.  A year later I was pregnant with twins. The pregnancy was without complications, the deliveries couldn't have been easier, and since birth they have been healthy, hearty little boys, thriving. I don't know if God rewarded me because of my fasting a year before, I don't know if God has kept sickness and disease away from my children because of my actions and fasting. But what if He has? What if He did? What if He is? All 4 of my children are beautiful, smart, funny, and healthy. I'm going to go off track for a sec, to address the idea that fasting is just an...

I love December so much! Santa Claus comes to town, Jesus celebrates his birthday for the 2,000+ time, candles get lit, family gets together, and then the whole thing culminates in a goodbye to 2012.  Although yesterday marked the twins turning 15 months old, which is shocking and scary how fast life is going, I still consider December to be pretty fantastic. My birthday kicks it off, and even though I had to turn an ugly number I still enjoyed getting pampered and shown extra affection by my family and friends. Ryan even bought me a new laptop to mark this birthday. I haven't had a new computer since I was a freshman in college, and it was such a fond memory, getting my own room for the first time in my life, AND a new computer!  So this private treasure brings back fond memories and I'm in love with this thing.  It smells like scotch tape and the keyboard lets me just fly. (I like the smell of scotch tape--can't explain.) December isn't with...

It's been brought to my attention that my blogs are long.  I will be making efforts to rectify this in future posts, starting now. During last election day I was in the hospital having Juliette. (Yes, I voted early.) Like many, I'm really over reading facebook statuses that only involve this election. I know it's super important. I know dialogue about issues can open lines of communication and perhaps education. But for many, our minds are made up early on and your status isn't going to sway that.  It's nice to feel like your opinions are being heard. I suppose that's why we can't help but write about them. But I feel so uncomfortable during these divisive times. Truly, I want us all to work together for good. And it is hard for me and probably you, to look past snarky disrespectful political posts and comments. You vote, I'll vote, and then let's work together. I will pray for our elected officials, as always, no matter the outcome. And if you...

Now that the school year has started we've got a pretty sweet schedule going, and the twins take a consistent nap every morning for about 1-2 hours while Juliette and Luke are at school. During that time I make some yummy ice coffee and settle into the horribly uncomfortable wooden computer chair no one in their sane mind would ever purchase, we probably found on the side of the road years ago. I check my facebook page and get caught up on the happenings of my peeps, I send some emails usually focused around my church responsibilities, do some calendar checking/planning, etc. Sometimes there's nothing very engaging so I get up and do more productive things, like picking up rocks and pins and hairballs and marbles all over the house that will find their way into my babies' hands, then mouths. But today I was engaged. I fell headfirst into reading mommy blogs. I became connected with another mom pregnant with twins a few months earlier in her pregnancy than I was, living in...